Once you've been to the best... everything else pales in comparison! The renaissance fair 'Scarborough' in TX is all we had ever experienced. We had really experienced it too. We had lived the life for three FULL days in 2008. Paige had dressed us in time period clothing, we had worked in the petting zoo and in three days been unable to take in every show or event. It is that big an event with so much to do and see. We have known that we would have to go back. The kids have begged to go back! We came very close to going this year. The plans were in motion and we were beginning to make arrangements to have a fun filled vacation beginning of course with a stop for a three day weekend once again at the Scarborough faire... or as the little boys call it... Paige's fair! However... life sometimes doesn't go according to plan and so the plans are only postponed... we will be going, just not this year.
So to make it up to the kids, I decided we could attend the Utah Renaissance faire. It was only an hours drive and there was a student entrance fee on Friday that was certainly reasonable. So off we went. We assumed it would be a smaller version, it only lasted two weekends compared to the nine of Scarborough. The weather was vastly different. In TX it had been over 100 degrees all three days! It was much below 100 today. Try 65 with a chance of rain.
We parked in the mud. Walked along a very bumpy road to the ticket booth. I was keenly aware of the bumpy road because I was attempting to push the stroller. Thankfully Caleb helped carry the stroller over some rocky sections and one very mucky one. We entered the fair and I was thankful I had had the forethought to take them to Subway before arriving. The smells of all the food vendors weren't as tempting on a full stomach. Their prices weren't tempting either way! I had given the kids each $5.00 to spend as they liked. I admonished them to spend it wisely.
At the ticket booth they gave us a program. The joust would be in 20 minutes. I had three very excited boys! Sarah... not so much.. til she remembered it would involve horses. So off to the jousting arena. We were waylaid a few times on our way. First by this fellow.... the ultimate sales man.
He saw two little boys and his eyes as I'm sure you can see were $. He was charming, and had a well rehearsed spiel that must work with all the little boys. Ok.. so he also had this Scottish accent, so their mother was entranced a little bit too... He flattered the boys, he measured them and found them worthy young squires in need of some knight training. He offered tips to good knightly chivalry, handshaking befitting of a knight. He had them kneel before him on a velvet pillow while they took an oath to be knights in training. They were in heaven with all this knight talk. Then he went in for the kill....
"What you've no sword or shield. What kind of knight can you be without armor lads?"
They began to protest that they did have swords, shields and armor to boot, but they had left it at home.
"A knight does not go anywhere without his armor! It's ok. Today, here most importantly, a knight must have his protection."
Catch on yet? He sells swords and shields.
I couldn't convince them that this wasn't the way to spend their money. They both had a sword post haste. And to top it off he let them paint it themselves...
(great... armed and dangerous and wet paint to start out our adventure!)
After the swords, we continued to make our way to the jousting area. We were waylaid once again by this fellow and his merry jenga game. He challenged all to a game him against everyone. It looked harmless, Sarah took a turn. He immediately called her a sissy for taking a loose center piece. He whipped a piece from the bottom with obvious skill! Then Miles attempted a piece very carefully. Then again he whipped a piece from the bottom. When he moved his piece another became obviously loose. Sarah quickly seized the chance to take that piece. He was a merry fellow and a crowd was gathering.
"Behold... Lady Sarah........ who cheats for all to see! There is no challenge in taking the loose piece. Yet she took it... the actions of a cheater I tell you!"
Sarah was grinning from ear to ear and beet red. He took another swipe at a piece and then announced to the crowd...
"Do not cheer for Lady Sarah, cheater of Jenga. It will only encourage her. Come Lady Sarah, it is your chance to redeem yourself."
Sarah took a piece very slowly. All the while he was taunting her with comments of cheating and slothful behaviour for her slowness.
He again took a piece so swiftly that we almost didn't see it happen. Caleb, and Miles took another turn. They must not have cheated or he was having too much fun at Sarah's expense because not much was said until Sarah took another turn. Again he admonished the ever growing crowd to not cheer or encourage this known cheater. They should instead escort her to the gallows for a time of penance was what was needed!
Another from the crowd attempted a turn and the tower fell.... the amateur!
It had been fun... He shook Sarah's hand and privately told her she had been a formidable opponent but not to let word of his kindness spread... he had a reputation to uphold!
The kids of course now want a giant jenga game to practice... he was very swift with his moves.
Off again toward the joust.
The stop directly before the joust was the petting zoo. We felt compelled to check it out. We had the most experience with this. Sorely inadequate. No supervision. Animals were either tethered or caged. There wasn't shade or shelter from the elements. Rules were non existent to say nothing of being posted. Hanf sanitizer was a bring your own policy. There was at least no charge.
Finally, the joust!!
It was the main event... the big attraction... Everyone was there.... It wasn't all that large a crowd. The kids had front row standing spots and Caleb and i stood back a few feet with the stroller. The joust lasted longer than usual as they explained the events and bantered as knights typically do. Then they began the events... first a javelin throw at the target. Then a heckler from the audience was brought forward to be punished. A helmet was placed on his head. A cantaloupe was set atop. Then the knights rode at him with sword in hand and sliced the melon in half.
Now for the actual jousting. Something happened to one of the knights steeds and a replacement horse was needed. The crowd was entertained while the knight in all his armor dismounted from the horse and had to stand while he waited for the new steed. The new steed was a spirited one. This was the first jousting in front of a crowd for this horse and so we were entertained with a few training runs. They proceeded to do some measuring passes and lance breaking runs to prepare the horse for the real thing. The jousting itself only lasted perhaps ten minutes. We had been entertained. The joust is a fun event. Afterwards the knights were available to pose for photographs and sign autographs.
The knight we stood in line for photos with was the national jousting champion two years running. He had been jousting on behalf of Scotland today, so we had cheered him on.
(more to come in a separate post about the armor and the boys!)
While we waited for our turn for a photo with Sir Kilney, Sarah had discovered something that she found even more entertaining. She watched in awe at the gymnastics on horseback routine. She was sad she hadn't been chosen as a volunteer to try it.
The joust was over. We had taken photos with the Knight. We had walked the entire fair. The kids determined that they were done. We could go. We had been there for a total of 90 minutes!
We made our way back toward the entrance. We stopped for a looky loo at a few merchants and their overpriced renaissance wares. There were lovely costume shops, and many food booths. The site for the fair was muddy thanks to all the recent rains and the booths were all makeshift tents. The sky was beginning to look ominous and without anywhere to seek refuge from the rain we decided to quit lolligagging and be on our way.
We were almost at the exit again and that meant that we were near our swords and shields salesman again. We did take a moment for a necessary photo op of the kids with their heads in the pillory
(often misnamed the stocks... it was misnamed here at the Utah fair) Our salesman came by and tormented Caleb in the appropriate Renaissance fashion and wouldn't release him without some sort of payment.
After singing Twinkle, twinkle for the crowd, he was released!
Yes Whittaker was with us. He never left the stroller. He was content to take in the sights and smells. He handled a sword at one point since Sarah felt sorry for him. He really didn't figure too prominently in our fair day until we realized it had been 3 hours since he had eaten and that he hadn't napped and we still had an hours drive ahead of us. With the approaching rain storm we hightailed it for the van, with a quick stop at the porta potties.
All in all... a fun afternoon... but it was agreed.. we've been spoiled and they would all rather go to Paige's fair. Even if they have to work to earn their keep and it is over 100 degrees.
P.S. The swords were cheaply made... Duncan's broke in half and Miles cracked within a few minutes of returning home. They were thrilled to retrieve their old trusty swords and shields that have withstood the last two years worth of sparring!
